Quotables!

Becca: I have the wiggles

KB: Just realized an omelette is just a breakfast quesadilla.

Later:

Tim: I just realized a wrap is just a salad in a flour sleeping bag.

Regarding Maggie being a camp counselor:

KB: She just seems so wittle.

Patience: Oh, she’s huge.

Andrea: I said D-U-M-B the other day--

4-year-old Isabella: BUTT?!?!!

Becca: Hey guys, Lindsay is coming to stay the night tonight as long as everyone’s cool with that! :)

Drew: Ok. I’ll put a shirt on.

Becca: Good idea lol.

Drew: I mean, I think we’ve established that clothes are annoying.

Becca: And very overrated.

KB: I actually don’t remember how old these contacts are.

Tim: You’re not supposed to do that!

KB: It’s fine!

Tim: Yeah, until they have to amputate your eyes!

Andrea: Gabe said woo tonight

KB: I noticed that. I almost loled.

Andrea: Me too. If you were in eye contact our eyes would have met and we would have giggled

Daddy: Sorry I missed your call this morning. We were in a meeting with…...Kitchen Man.

Andrea: Can u get married ASAP so we can double date to the Bahamas this fall

We have extra room

Tim: Seth and I were talking recently about how we hate nonchalant nail clipping people

Becca: I like the idea of gluten-free waffles, but then I tried them and they weren’t that great.

KB: Really?

Becca: Yeah… I think it’s the syrup. I don’t really like syrup.

KB: So don’t use syrup?

Becca: But I like syrup…

KB: But you just said you don’t like syrup….

Becca: Well not on my waffles…

KB: So what do you eat on your waffles?

Becca: Syrup…

KB: I’m so confused.

Becca: I think I like the IDEA of syrup… but it’s too sweet.

KB: So don’t use it!

Becca: But I like it!

Tim: i called alina a fatty and she cried

Becca: Are you cold?

Erin: Yeah.

Becca: *with her mouth suddenly and inexplicably filled with ice* Do you wanna ithe coob?

KB: Hahaha!

Becca: Don’t make fun of me, KB!

KB: How could I not?!

Becca: I don’t currently have an answer to that question.

KB: Yeah, cuz you’re fulla ithe coob!

Becca: Do YOU wanna ithe coob?

At school:

Joe: Can you come with me for a second? I need to get my moonshine.

Pat: If the fish has babies yall help ‘em with lamaze, ok?

Becca: Was that a pooptable??

The boy Becca nannies wrote his Mother's Day assignment about Becca. One item on his list was, "She is a good cook."

KB: WAIT. I just looked at that picture again and saw #5. Either Jack has low standards or you've been hiding something!!! ;-)

Becca: There is a word I would use here but it would cost me a quarter in the swear jar. -_-

KB: The internet makes things more confusing than necessary.

Becca: Lets delete the Internet

KB: K

Rebecca's foot falls asleep

Rebecca: Wake up, foot! Your country needs you!

Becca: I went to a movie last night

All alone

KB: Mr. and Mrs. Duncan say hi to yall and everybody, and Mr. Duncan says to give you all hell.

Dad’s response: Why, that’s a nice sentiment.

Mom’s response: You can check that second one as done. :)

KB: I don't know what to get people for their birfdays

Rebecca: Me either.

KB:  but one of them's yours

Rebecca: Well...I want to make this pattern sometime, so I guess that's a suggestion.  

She sends me a link for a dress pattern

KB: ok, well, that'd be good for William I guess, but what do YOU want?

Rebecca: Toy cars.

KB: oh, that's easy

Rebecca: Millions of them.

And maybe some motorcycles and legos for good measure.

KB: remote controlled?

Rebecca: Oh, yes.

KB: I am bored, tell me a story

Rebecca: Once upon a time, there was a girl who demanded that her little sister tell her a story, because she was bored, so the little sister did.  The end.

KB: that was the worst story ever

you better tell another one

a better one

one with more inherent fun

Rebecca: Once upon a time there was a plague, and everyone died except for one person, and so she went and played on a swingset that all the mean kids had never let her play on when they were alive, and had fun.  The end.

Drew: Just say no, to snacks, and drugs, and Leo’s nose on the back of your thigh.

Becca: We should make a poster!

Drew: Hey, how much do I owe you?

Becca: Well, doobaflatchit gave me… hang on.

They do some calculations

KB: Wait, was *I* doobaflatchit? I just assumed someone else was doobaflatchit, but now I’m thinking *I* may have been doobaflatchit.

Becca: You were doobaflatchit.

Drew: Do you wanna build a snowman?

KB: I’m not going to respond to that.

Drew: Ok bye….

KB: One of the worst things ever if when you poop in a public bathroom and then there’s no soap. You’re all like UNCLEAN! UNCLEAN!

Becca: Ew. Don’t ever shake my hand again

KB: I’ll try to remember to stop that habit

Becca: Good. It’ll be difficult, I have really awesome hands. But they only touch clean things - like Leo. He’s really clean. He cleans his butt and his fur with the same tongue...but it’s clean because he cleans it. He is worthy of my hands.

Becca: I just sang Leo some Taylor swift music. He’s officially the love of my life

KB: But he didn’t break up with you, how can you sing T-Swifty about him?

Becca: There are a select two songs I choose from

VA: The other day, me and Rump were talking about how we’re such a progressive couple. He’s shorter than me, and we’re an interracial couple.

KB: Because you’re black?

VA: Why yes.

KB: Well that makes sense.

VA: Breaking social boundaries. We’re pioneers.

KB: I can hear the neighbor snoring again. That is absolutely 100% not ok.

Becca: We should go buy breathe right strips and place them on their back porch area

Anonymously

With a note that says: you’re disturbing angels. Please make it stop.

Luis: You’re my friend, ish.

KB: We shared a cupcake!! We have a bond!

Luis: *whispers* It’s not strong enough.

Rebecca: Maggie and I had our physicals this afternoon, and [the doctor] basically spent the whole time telling me that I need to eat constantly and get fat.

Pat: *with great urgency* Uh oh. *long pause* That man looks like a bumblebee.

KB: Oooooo I got sunburned again today... dangit!

VA: I will bring you a burkha tomorrow.

VA: Fiiiiiine, we can listen to arminian music.

KB: Could you drive less bumpily? I'm trying to work. GENIUS IS HAPPENING HERE.

VA: Where?

Genise: Riley was very sad that I left.

KB: You should have brought him, you could have put him in your bag.

Genise: One, he is not a purse dog. Two, I would never own a purse dog. Three, I think it’s degrading to dogs to put them in a purse. Four………

KB: Four….

Genise: Four…. all of the above.

Dad: Portland, OR - home of the ugly tattoo. Nice people, but ugly tattoos.